Sweet Poison
by CretianStar
Summary: Attempting the 30day challenge! Wednesday and Joel sweet fluffiness. WARNING, it's now a little more smutty! Extended into some tangy lemons and be so fluffy the Addam's would faint.
1. Sweet Poison

Okay: So it's a toss up between this pairing and Sherlolly of the beautiful Sherlock fandom. So I'm going to do both! Probably one of each! I think!

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30 Day Challenge

**Day 1: Holding Hands**

Joel had had enough of being scared by Wednesday. He didn't mind waking up with a red-back spider sat on his forehead, almost daring him to move; he didn't mind the complicated traps he often found himself in, or having Mrs Addams fix him back up with a little help from Grandmama. What he disliked was Wednesday's aloofness, her cold calculating behaviour didn't have to extend to him as well – he adored her and always would.

Joel wanted to at least her hand. He already had Mr and Mrs Addams' approval for his courtship, but he was getting bored of playing the incredibly long game of wearing down Wednesday Addams.

Instead, he had accompanied her when she was collecting belladonna leaves from the overgrown wilderness that made up the Addams estate. He held the wicker basket that contained the clippings of the dangerous plant while she filled it, occasionally adding other wicked flora to the haul.

It was as they turned back to the imposing mansion in front of them that Joel slipped his left hand into her right one. He felt her stiffen and felt fear and lust pool in his stomach as she froze and slowly turned to glare at him. Joel fought to keep his face impassive as she stared at him, her emotionless black eyes were calculating, reading his intentions, analysing as always. Joel knew Wednesday had already thought of twenty two different ways to kill him, and that was without the apothecary's tool kit hanging in his right hand.

"Come on then Wednesday, your parents will be wondering where we have got to. No doubt Grandmama will want her share of the plants we have gathered tonight." Joel was stunned he kept his voice level. Well he probably didn't; Wednesday was probably reading some small give in his demeanour – she was a psychopath, she could practically smell fear from someone.

The dark haired teenager said nothing as they continued up towards the house, leaving her cold dry hand in his warm grasp.

Joel Glicker may not have been a psychopath, or a genius, but it didn't stop him from seeing the small blush that rose on the porcelain skinned girl, or the twitch of the lips that was a tell-tale sign of a smile. After all, Wednesday Addams only smiled fully if she killed someone, the little twitch was good enough for Joel.


	2. Spoons in the Library

A/N: Technically this is a day late BUT my remarkably thriving social life dictated I couldn't go on my computer yesterday to upload this! Sorry guys!

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Day 2

**Cuddling Somewhere**

Joel believed he had made much more progress than the past two years.

He'd actually held her hand, but a small taste of Wednesday had made him crave it more.

They sat in the dilapidated library in the Addams' house, Wednesday was unnecessarily refreshing her memory on the sources of cyanide while Joel read through some of the more tame literature. She flumped on the armoire, her expression warned Joel that she was bored but he was on a high from yesterday, even if it was a small victory.

He said nothing, putting Wind and the Willows gently on the table for fear of upsetting the book and he tugged her into his arms. Like the night before she stiffened again and sat stiff as a board in his arms against his chest. But Joel had surmised that ignoring Wednesday at times like this was best – he was not going to make any headway if he kept asking if it was okay; she would always say no. But Joel knew she needed this.

Joel ignored her picking up his book again, stroking the spine to please the tome and began to read again one handed, the other arm wrapped around Wednesday who relaxed ever so slightly. She had relaxed enough to lean back into the chair and was leant slightly towards him. Not enough for an average person to see but Joel _knew_ Wednesday now.

Well he knew more than most people did.

That's how he knew that the dark haired girl was okay with Joel's arm around her waist while he carried on reading.


	3. Wednesday's One Up

Day 5

Kissing

Wednesday knew what Joel was trying to do and she was disgruntled to realise that part of her liked Joel's attention. It annoyed her immensely but she also decided, rather than lagging behind Joel in this small little game, she would play her advantage.

Joel had suggested a walk again, and Wednesday saw through the façade but she agreed regardless. She needed to show Joel she was still in charge.

It was at the skeletons of the willow trees, by the stagnant pond, they were staring at the clouds skudding across the night sky. There was a wolf howl somewhere nearby and Wednesday missed the little skittish jump that Joel used to give. But she refused to dwell on her small amount of sentimentality towards the strange young man, and pressed forward with her experiment.

"Joel." She murmured, suddenly a flush of nervousness surged through her system. _Why in Circe was she nervous?_

"Yes Wednesday?" The pair were sat back on a black moth eaten picnic rug, and he had rested himself closer than really necessary. He turned to stare at her in her silence.

She pressed her lips to his without, remarkably for her, thinking. He was warm and a strange contrast to the feel of her own porcelain skin. She was surprised by his heat, and gave an un-Wednesday like squeak as he reacted faster and cupped her face in his hands. His tongue licked at her lips and he begged for entrance.

She had not expected this. Her brain was racing from its sluggish start to get one over on him. So Wednesday allowed him in and opened her mouth. She was shocked at the feel of his tongue probing and was astounded as she realised he was now atop her and kissing her.

"Joel." She gasped pulling away.

The moment was over.


	4. Louisiana Voodoo

A/N: A tiny little drabble to see just how female Wednesday really is.

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Day 8

**Shopping**

"Wednesday, a coffin really isn't necessary." Joel was patient with his … girlfriend, (was she a girlfriend?) but the main part of that was _girl._

She may not have done pink and fluffy unicorns but Wednesday did enjoy shopping – for the macabre of course. Joel would have died laughing to see have seen Wednesday at one of the shopping centres dotted around but the back roads and slightly dodgy apothecaries that were still around.

Unfortunately they were in New Orleans, voodoo central and Wednesday's heaven. It was the family holiday, a shack-like cabin in the middle of the swamp serving them as a holiday home and the Addams' loved it.

Wednesday was amazed by the dark magic that was being sold on the streets and had spent a lot of money, some it Joel's as he gave her small tokens of his affection.

Shopping was a woman thing, no matter if they were psychotic or not.


	5. Kitten Magic

A/N: Ooopsy so this update is (4) days late but it's my mommas birthday so I've been running around like a headless chicken trying to sort out everything out for her, because she's my mummy.

Anyway enough excuses…and I'm cheating, but deal with it!

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Day 9 

**Animal Ears**

"Wednesday!" Joel shouted from one end of the swamp shack. He was sharing a room with Pugsley while Wednesday and Grandmama were at the other end. The girl in question turned to stare at the young man storming towards her. He actually looked angry.

"Yes Joel?" She had that demure look on her face, it was demureness mixed with her usual uncaring attitude. But Joel knew her well enough now to see the smirk playing in the depths of her dark eyes.

"What are these Wednesday Friday Addams?" He pointed to the two cat ears that were poking above his hair line; the bright ginger fur was a stark contrast to his dark hair. Joel was too annoyed to notice Grandmama and Morticia look up from their reading to smile at the exchange between the youths.

"I don't…"

"Don't you even dare Wednesday, this is your trip to the apothecary, this is what you had planned all along isn't it?!"Joel snapped and Wednesday looked up in surprise – it wasn't the first time Wednesday had laced him with some enchantment or hex and normally he had taken them all in good humour but this seemed to be one too far.

"Yes it was me." She went back to her book on Marie Laveau, she heard Joel sigh, could almost hear him mentally counting to ten and another patient sigh.

"Get rid of them Wednesday." He huffed and swiftly disappeared out of the shack and they heard the whirr of the motor boat engine.

"Ohh Wednesday." Grandmama croaked and laughed. "You can only push them so far Wednesday."

"Joel adores you Wednesday and would die for you but I think you need to stop practising your magic on him Wednesday." Her mother pulled her attention away from the voodoo queen she was researching and Wednesday sighed.

"Okay Mother." She laid the dusty tome down on the pew she was curled in and wandered back to her shared room. The altar was waiting there, the picture of the ginger kitten was sat behind the pestle and mortar, in all honesty her spell hadn't worked properly – she'd wanted to turn Joel into the sweet little kitten pictured and she wasn't sure why the spell hadn't worked properly. Because of that she had no idea how to undo it.

She bit her lip and wracked her brain – dark voodoo magic was relatively new to her and Joel had now taken the boat. She'd have to consult her mother and Grandmama and admit failure.

Brilliant.

Joel hadn't even really left; he'd used the motor to move it away from the house but cut the engine and then rowed back. He wasn't really angry with Wednesday; he was just annoyed that his progress with her was so slow. He wanted more with her; Joel wanted to prove that he truly loved her, with all of his soul. He adored the psychopathic young woman, with her emotionless stares and glaring eyes. Every fibre of his being wanted to be with her for the rest of his life, only she wasn't reciprocating.

Joel pushed the rows back onto the floor of the little boat as it bumped into the gnarled old wood of the cabin. He stood, stretched, feeling his back click satisfyingly. Just as Joel was about to step out there was a strange popping noise and everything seemed to grow above him.

"WEDNESDAY!" He shouted, or more importantly, he mewed. _Mewed_; fricking cat ears! He looked down at his _paws_ and his _tail_ and huffed, pawing himself in the forehead he attempted to jump out of the boat. It was now too high and he was now too small. Bloody hell Wednesday, now he was kind of angry. He set about trying to get her attention; he yowled as loudly as he could until Grandmama came out of the house.

"Dinner!" She called with a gummy grin and Joel stiffened in shock, cat meat obsessed family. He began scratching at the old woman's wrist, but Grandmama was used to her prey fighting back and just slapped his paws. "Now now kitty let's go!"

"Did you say kitty?" Wednesday opened the front door to the porch.

"Yeah right little loud one will be lovely to eat." Grandmama presented the little ginger kitten to Wednesday.

"No Grandmama you can't! That's Joel!" She snatched the kitten off of her elderly relative who pouted at losing the main family meal and then snickered.

"You turned him into a full cat?" She began to cackle and hobbled back into the house.

"Well the spell worked." Wednesday held the rather indignant, angry looking ginger kitten up to her inspection. "Now I need to learn how to turn you back…" She grinned, cradling the very grumpy kitten who sneezed once and dug his claws into her hand. The girl kneaded **that spot** behind his ears and Joel purred, retracting his claws and curled up in the cradle made by the Addams' daughter's arms.


	6. A Bigger Problem

A/N: I'ma back, with a clear decision on how I'm splitting this challenge betwixt my Addams fic and my Sherlolly ones. Anyway… enjoy!

Totally NSFW and a smutty one. It gets a little twisted so if you don't like, don't read. You have been warned.

Side note: There really seems to be no nice word for vagina, and if you can think of one then please review or PM me it, even if you keep yourself anonymous I don't care because I struggled with this in this fic.

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Day 15: Genderswap

**A Bigger Problem**

"Wednesday?" Joel croaked. He felt awful and he was struggling to remember what happened. Gomez hadn't got the absinthe out last night so why on earth did he feel so bad?

He rolled to his front and two things happened.

Firstly, everything came flooding back. Including the fact he was nearly supper if Grandmama had had her way.

Secondly he realised his chest was uncomfortable and unusually lumpy. Rolling back onto his side Joel was alarmed to see his silhouette in the dimly lit room had most definitely changed. Peeking over his shoulder to see if Pugsley was in bed, Joel realised how different he felt. Pugsley was thankfully absent and Joel rolled onto his back.

Running a tentative hand Joel was aghast to realise they were a full, plump, perky pair of breasts. Oh Gods! He gaped.

His brain seemed to cartwheel at the realisation and he was vaguely thankful he was no longer a cat, but he was now a woman.

Wait, a woman, did that mean…?

His hand delved beneath the covers and his boxers and sure enough his penis was gone. He actually had to muffle a scream this time and his touch flinched at the feel of his new female parts. It took a while to calm himself down, but with a hand resting on his breast and another over the soft mound of his newly acquired genitalia. It appeared he still had his male libido and if he was male he'd definitely be erect.

There was something strangely erotic at the feel of his own touch on his nipples, they were more sensitive than he was as a guy and Joel began to pinch and roll them in his fingers. Keeping an alert ear on the noises outside the door, he was startled to hear a knock on the door.

Scrambling beneath the covers Joel rolled over and hoped his hair was still short – it was cropped still, but most definitely a feminine cut.

"Joel?" It was Morticia.

"M'awake." Joel grunted, even his voice was girly. "I don't feel very well though." He fought his voice box to sound lower.

"That's okay garcon doux, Wednesday is also unwell; I believe the spell took it out of her yesterday. I am sorry for my daughter's ways sometimes, I fear Gomez and I tutored her too well in the darker arts." Morticia paused, clearly thinking about something before turning back to the form of Joel scrunched under the blankets. "Anyway the rest of us are going to New Orleans again and we'll be taking the boat. Grandmama left the dinner you missed yesterday so if you get hungry then feel free to have some. Bientôt Mieux!" Finally Morticia left, vaguely suspicious of why both refused to get out of bed but put it down to the energy draining ritual that was required to make Joel human shaped again.

Joel waited with bated breath and burning loins for the family to leave but finally the little speed boat heralded their departure and his hand dived back to his breasts again. His nipples re-stiffened under his fingers ministrations and he growled in the pleasure that washed through his body. Venturing a somewhat nervous hand south Joel was delighted and terrified at the wetness he encountered. The heat was intoxicating and his fingers delved deeper inside him, tugging moans from his mouth at the alien sensations rocketing through his brain.

His fingers almost scrabbled at the sensitive flesh until he found a pace and a rhythm that made him whine in pleasure. One hand still tugging at his reddened nipples, he bit into the pillow next to him in an attempt to stifle the moans pouring from his lips at the strange but intoxicating feelings washing over his system. Finally, Joel felt stars behind his eyes and his fingers sped up their work until he felt the tell-tale orgasm washing over him that temporarily paralysed him and made him blind.

Gasping for air Joel rode on a wave of carnal elation until there was a knock at his door. Startled, and a little disgruntled to have been pulled down from his high, he hastily ran to open the door knowing it'd be Wednesday and he needed to be righted, preferably before her parents came home.

He was stopped in his tracks by the sight of Wednesday in front of him, her delicate features had roughened somewhat and she was red faced. She'd shot up in height, or maybe he'd shrunk and under her stretched t-shirt he saw muscles. She was blushing intently, which looked weird on a male face but Joel realised with an all too girly squeal that he was topless and his breasts were bouncing at his laboured breathing.

Diving back into the room he scrabbled for a t-shirt that had been roomy on his male lean frame and was now stretching against his breasts. They were actually a hindrance. How did girls cope with this?!

"What did you do Wednesday?" He hissed, desperate not to hear the feminine voice that would make him squirm.

"I don't know!" He heard the desperation in her own, very gravelly, and disturbingly manly voice.

"We need to right this now!" His voice shot up the octaves very quickly and the pair winced at the pitch.

Feeling safe that her parents would be gone for a few hours Wednesday led him…her… Joel to the bedroom she resided in and to the altar she had set up.

A picture of Marie Laveau sat next to a little ginger kitten and Joel quirked an eyebrow.

For the next hour and a half the pair furiously read and collected various items from the kitchen, and the swamp outside. After Joel had showered off the green gunk that constituted as the swamp he saw Wednesday's eyes hover over his embarrassing form. Clearing his throat he chivvied her along and finally the rather gunky looking concoction sat in two mugs in front of them.

"Together?" Joel whispered and Wednesday nodded. Picking up the pewter jugs the pair tipped the foul tasting liquid into their mouths.

The effect was slow and the pair wouldn't see themselves resume their forms as the Valerian herb in the mixture took effect. The pair collapsed onto the bed, asleep in seconds as the voodoo elements wove a shroud of smoke around the pair, the magic working, a beat of drums flooded their dreams.


	7. Close Quarters

A/N: Okay so this should have gone up yesterday but it just didn't upload! Anyway have this a day late!

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Day 16: Morning Rituals

**Close Quarters**

Thankfully Wednesday and Joel had both woken up with their correct anatomical parts in place, but wrapped in each other's arms. Wednesday woke to the sound of her father's spluttering gasp followed by his mirthful chuckle and the sound of a door closing.

Joel woke to the sound of Gomez's baritone announcing that Grandmama and Pugsley would now be sharing instead. Which they did and although Joel had been a little sheepish that morning, life continued on as normal.

It was similar when they got home, only Morticia had helped Joel move his meagre possessions into Wednesday's room. Joel had expecting, with his fluctuating level of progress in Wednesday's affections for her to have reverted back to her more lethal side. Instead she had sat primly on the end of her bed and watched, bored, as Morticia helped Joel rearrange the Victorian cyanide bottles and poisons to put his heavy tomes, borrowed from the library. She stopped them moving a dangerous blue skull shaped bottle from one cubbyhole but that was it.

Wednesday had had the same bed since she was a child, a narrow solid bed but Gomez had decided that the pair needed a more suitable bed. So they took a tour of the extensive loft and unused bedrooms and Wednesday found one she adored. They all knew that the young woman liked the new bed because there was that gleam in her eyes when Lurch heaved it down the rickety stairwell. It was ebony, intrinsically carved with a huge skull engraved into the headboard. It was four poster bed, but the original curtains had been long gone, so Grandmama dug out another pair of vivacious red ones while Joel had presented Wednesday with black sheets which had made her ecstatic.

Morticia watched with fondness as the awkward pair settled into a routine in the morning.

If Wednesday woke first Joel soon knew about it; she usually pushed him out of bed. He usually climbed back in silently and fell back asleep. He was used to worse abuse than that, after all if you survive cyanide poisoning, being pushed out of bed is nothing at all! He rolls over onto her side of the bed and opens one eye lazily, he cracks a grin, almost daring her to do worse.

Wednesday's eyes narrow at his smug face but she says nothing and gets out of bed, slipping from the black sheets and disappearing into their en suite. If Joel wants to roll over, and Wednesday leaves the door open, he can see her mask of emotionless slip a little, she gets that gleam in her eye and if Joel is willing to play along he'll pad out of bed, across the room and wrap his arms around her waist.

If he's not willing to play along, which is rare, he'll stay rolled over and Wednesday knows it's one of two things – he's ill or she's done something wrong.

But that's only if Wednesday wakes up first.

If Joel is the one first woken, it's far more special. He gathers the rigid young woman into his arms, silently revelling as her stiff posture loosens in his arms and she almost curls around him. Her dark hair free from its constricting plaits is spread of his chest, her pale fingers are splayed over his stomach and her leg hooks around his while his arm goes dead supporting her.

The first time she had woken up like that she had been far more cold and aloof than before, however slowly but surely, she now just carried on her morning ablutions like normal Wednesday Addams.


	8. Family Get-Togethers

**Family Get-Togethers**

A/N: Okay so the month challenge has gone! I've totally given up. But thanks to one beautiful reviewer (doggedly persistant and wonderful to hear from) I have the next installment of this little one. I re read the story over and over and didn't quite know how to complete the next chapter so I can only hope cloe3511 that this is up to your standards.

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Joel knew his life with the Addams' changed him as a person. It wasn't until he saw his mother and father on thanksgiving that he realised how much. The cliches of the evening, of dinner, of conversation was meneal and trivial and Joel hated it all. There was no Beezlebub chasing Thing across the table, no exploding goose carcasses.

There was no Wednesday.

She had outright refused to join him and he didn't blame her. Especially as his mother had brought along one of her society friend's family as well. One big shared, merry Thansgiving that made Joel want to vomit.

Where was the black, the cobwebs, the decaying food? It was all plump turkeys and stuffing and vegetables and all Joel could think of he wanted his Pocahontas to come and ruin the day again. What made him more desperate for his dark seductress was Amelia Von Weber, the sickly sweet daughter of his mother's friend. Sat purposely next to him she fluttered her eyes every time he handed her a bowl of carrots.

"Your mother tells us you live with friends Joel?" Amelia simpered, hand brushing his as the peas were next. Conversation was flowing as freely as the wine around the table but Joel sensed his mother's little ears prick up at Amelia's voice.

"Indeed, they're a very lovely family..."

"Lovely,..." His mother scoffed. "Unique yes but not lovely." She snorted and downed a little more wine.

"On the contrary, I think my family is lovely." A voice from behind made the whole room freeze and there stood his Queen, his beautiful girlfriend, black hair straight as always looking fresh from the grave. Amelia squealed somewhat and Joel hid a chuckle but stood to greet Wednesday.

"I think your family is lovely too." He whispered in her ear as he kissed her cheek as a hello.

"I came to see if you were finished but the front door was wide open." Wednesday could play act as well as any of the social climbers in here and she stared at his mother. "Careless mistake in this neighbourhood. Who knows what might have been lurking outside." Her voice was emotionless but Joel sensed the slight threat in her tone.

"Yes who knows?" He smiled at the silent scene; Wednesday had such a way with people. "Well I'm going to head home."

"This is your home!" His mother sputtered and Joel hid a snort of derision. "Besides I have creme brulee for dessert and trifle!" She stood up hastily, tottering on her heels thanks to the fourth glass of red wine.

"No thank you Mother. It was lovely meeting you Amelia but please let me introduce my girlfriend Wednesday Addams." Joel gestured to the dark haired girl watching amazement wash over the blonde's face. Amazement that turned to derision and scorn. It seemed Amelia had had a little too much wine as well.

"You! You're his girlfriend?! What did you do drug him? Why would he want a dark haired little rake like you, pasty white you look like a corpse! He could have any girl he wanted; like me. I've got everything a man wants, blonde hair, curves in all the right places and I actually see sunlight!"

"You're also sleeping with Joel's father." Wednesday said calmly, watching the whole room once more and another deathly silence fell. Amelia stopped mid rant and froze, eyes bulged slightly and she panicked looking at Mr Glicker who was very red.

"Happy Thanksgiving." Joel grabbed his coat and darted for the door, dragging Wednesday with him. The sight of Lurch in his chauffeur outfit was a welcome one and relief washed over him as theyslipped into the back of the car.

"Happy Thanksgiving indeed." Wednesday gave him her best attempt at a smile and he kissed her full on the mouth as Lurch drove them home.


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